I feel the misalignment of communication luring around the corner. Not necessarily out of intention, but with Mercury turning retrograde once more before the end of this year it's a natural progression of this time, and in the shadow of the retrograde I am already noticing it.
I had nearly forgotten that we had one more retrograde to go before the year was over. It will run through my birthday next month, tied obviously into my Sun sign of Capricorn this time around, which will be particularly strong for introspection. I have been delving within much this month, looking to refocus on certain aspects that I want to pay special attention to in the coming year. I like what my dear friend Wendy does in creating goals for each of the 5 elements -- perhaps I will do the same for my birthday. I started to think about it last night, so many tying into one another, as is a natural tendency with the elements when you look at the notion of all is one in the divine mind. It's all One, but the separation is necessary for focus, for me.
I feel like it's going to be a strong year for me -- they say the "3" is focused this year on "creativity", which ties in brilliantly with the work I'll be focusing on in the year, but I am also in the energy of "balance" with this coming 3 -- the balance between two extremes, and this is a key point for me personally with a return to gravity, return to neutrality, and, with the retrograde in Capricorn: return return return. I'm taking full advantage of this introspective time, and while normally I save much important communication (if it can wait) until after the retrograde, I am being clearly told that I will be right in the center of it, irregardless of my awareness of conscious communication or not, it's necessary for certain aspects of fumbling along in language. It's not to be mistaken for careless language, the fumbling isn't about unconsciousness, it's not to negate kindness in communication, far from it.
I've been feeling the language barriers come up. I'm not proficient in astrology, though, like most people on this path or similar New Age thinking, I keep track of when Mercury goes retrograde. This understanding now of the Shadow aspect of the retrograde is fascinating and completely true. It's really no different than womyn who experience their moon cycles and how it isn't simply for the week they are experiencing it, but the week before and the week after. The release is extraordinary when you're looking at the culmination of the energy surfacing at the beginning, the release, then the aftermath. Amazing.
It's the eve of the Solstice, blessings of snow have fallen upon New England and I took Nimue out in it this morning to play, throw snowballs around, even if I have fully accepted the fact that I will probably never make a decent snowball to save my life, we had a ton of fun, and she made her first snow angel... it was a great family day, much gratitude for these quiet days alone.
Tomorrow I am planning a Yule ritual after Nimue goes to bed, bringing in the light, gratitude for the Sun's blessings... so many blessings this year... I'm so acutely aware of the "small things" in life, the gratitude that each of those small things bring, even in the pain of loss that is still tender at this time (it has been a month since Jonathan and Amy's passing, to the day), I'm not losing sight of what each moment brings, and how I wish those moments to end. It's not fear-based, for once it doesn't feel at all attached to fear, just this necessity to figure it out, to understand and acknowledge gifts, in a more heart-centered place.
Excited for the return of the Sun... return of the light... but more importantly sharing that light. Let it emanate from us all, and return, threefold.