Entering September, this is my favorite time of year. I adore everything about the fall season, and living in New England is something I truly appreciate this time of year. I tend to awaken in the darker half of the year, more creative, more introspection that feels like tending to my inner garden, even if the "timing" of the year is traditionally for rest, the introspection for me fuels movement.
I love how things that you put out into the Universe, with true pure intention, fosters itself into opportunities.
I've been craving change, although content with where I am in life, still I seem to crave change now and again, from subtle things in life to things on a larger scale.
There is a possibility that we could put into movement the prospects of moving... out of state. I have been wanting to move for quite some time, although timing (and economy) haven't been right. As Nimue gets older I want her to grow up in a home, free from some of the imperfections we are experiencing with our neighbors (trying to think in Spirit and not say something dreadful about them), plus we just want a house, somewhere she can play in a backyard, a little larger than this, but I'm not picky, I don't want a gigantic home where we need intercoms to contact another member of the family in a different room. Cozy is more like it.
Where to go?
That has been the debate. The man would prefer something warm, down south, specifically Florida. I would sooner move back to California before ever moving to Florida, which means it will never happen! Plus, with the global issues, Florida seems like a poor choice to live, the chances of actually *keeping* a home with Mother Nature's rage seems unlikely. Then again, I don't like the heat. I need a place with seasons... truly, New England, as much as it can be, is my home.
This discussion has been going on for years, we've pulled out maps, pointed to destinations we wouldn't mind, and neither one of us could agree on anything... ever. It's hilarious really, because we actually both want to move to Ireland... oh but the costs and everything else to consider, it may just be a dream.
So the reality? We have decided upon Maine. I know... Maine. The man is originally from Maine, and he abhors winter and wants to live in warmer (snow-free) climates, and yet we're going a step backwards, for him, to Maine... or at least considering it. However, I don't mind Maine. I seem to frequent the southern part often when my alter ego becomes a groupie. I love the peace of it, and all those trees, so beautiful.
This is all dependent upon a future (possible) transfer in the man's job... something we're actually both hoping for, because we're both ready to leave this place, leave NH, and just move forward. Maine is calling us. As with anything, I trust the Universe will let us know if this is what is best for us... but I'm hoping it really is, even if it means that we will move hours away from my family, I think as I get older I'm actually more content with that.
In other news, I have the opportunity to possibly do a one-year apprenticeship with Christopher Penczak. I have been debating on whether this was the year to start DU or not, and then I got word that Christopher was doing an apprenticeship for the Inner Temple series. I adore Christopher and we have similar views and beliefs in the way we practice, both within the craft but also in our healing modalities.
He once mentioned that he felt I didn't need to do such a series, as has been the majority of what others have shared with me, but after BFC I felt like I needed to strip back to basics. While I would love the opportunity to do Z's DU, or even Bendis' Apple Branch, I have never been one who prefers online teaching when you have the opportunity to do "in person" teaching. Plus, as I've said, I do adore Christopher, he is a wonderful teacher, and even better person. It's an opportunity I would hate to pass up on. It's an experience.
I haven't decided anything yet, although I am leaning to yes and plan to send in my application next week. I enjoyed the 2-year apprenticeship I did with the Shamanic training, and I've been wanting to take more classes with Christopher.
What I like about him is that his work is truly beyond the typical "Wicca 101". He touches upon varies techniques, and I feel privileged that in the years I have known him that he has shared some of his techniques and works with me outside of the classroom.
I admit, I still put him on a bit of a pedestal, and I blush a bit when he looks at me as his equal, but I want to do this apprenticeship outside of ego.
I can hear Kailash say to me, still, that what he suspects I need is more practice/devotion vs learning/studying more. I know, I know. I have heard this argument before. I am forever the perpetual student, fearful of stepping to the plate to teach, once more.
We have been discussing this a lot at ADC, each of us progressing towards our own willingness and desire to teach. I do miss it. I don't regret leaving DoveStar, because I wanted to be home with Nimue full time, but also the direction of the school wasn't where my spirit and heart were any more, but I still miss it.
I will mediate on this, and trust that whatever happens is the direction the Goddess wishes me to face. )0(