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Showing posts from January, 2014

With regrets or without.

I've always considered myself a person without regret. I think many of us want to be that person -- the present-tense living, not looking back, swimming to a shore of possibilities instead of nearly drowning in the deep end of "what ifs". I'm not that person. Or maybe I am. Sometimes. I'm a contemplative person. I like the notion of "what if", though sometimes I can let myself replay it over and over, not quite like a broken record, but nearly undesirable wallpaper I surround myself with, in constant debate if I actually like the patterns or not.

I was thinking tonight about regrets. I've said I never had them. I said that everything happens for a reason. I said that everything led me to now, and I appreciate and love now... except... I tasted some of that regret tonight in a meditation. Huh... so that's what's been lingering in the back of my throat all these years?

It may or may not be a regret... maybe just a wonder. That "what if&qu…