In a "year"... in a decade...
It's been a week of reflecting -- a week of peeling away the layers to reveal old memories. This hasn't felt like a "year", it's been tremendously longer than that. The days appear to go by faster the older you get, and yet, when you look at the end of the year and see the 12 months behind you, it doesn't feel so fast after all. At least not to me, not this year, not in a year where I was cradling the pain and needing to step outside of the shadow to see the actual light. It was brighter than I remembered, and while my eyes didn't burn from the impact, tears still fell... in a year of building so many relationships, and needing to say goodbye to others, how is it that at the end of the year I feel as though I am always meant to face the final dark alone? It's the Cave. It calls to me, even now, even as the words flow (at a fragmented pace), that retreating to the Cave is what I would normally be doing this time of year. I go within, retreat, a