The Goddess Within

What started off as a heart-filled week of practice in receiving love has now brought to the surface the old, clogged, murky shit that I had kept so well-hidden, so deeply buried that I even fooled myself into thinking it was cleared.  The awakening of only some of that has been somewhat shocking, somewhat of a relief, but mostly manifesting itself as anger.  Deeply rooted anger at/for/with Self, which all sits partnered in the manifestation of fear. Last month I was processing through fear, making it a point to invite it to the surface, not so I could secretly pounce and attack, but really understand where it's coming from, why I place so much emphasis on believing I "need" to keep it, and what it really wants.  What is the purpose of this fear?  In some ways it served a purpose, was there for a reason, but sometimes those reasons no longer hold true, but instead of sending it away with love, I kept it there, prisoner, then simply ignoring and/or forgetting about it. 

Taking some time to catch up after the day-long Temple Leadership Retreat.  I never get tired of them, wishing I had more availability in my schedule to take time out to do more of them, each one is a new experience, new moment of self-discovery, and moments of connecting and reconnecting.  Today was a different retreat than those I normally tend to participate in, but it was a good different. Gathering together with the other ministries and getting to hear first hand what the intention is, who the faces were behind each of these pillars was quite exciting.  The brainstorming, the collective conscious, the respect that was shared in that room today was empowering, and really gratifying to be a part of.  I was so impressed with everyone's thoughts and how far the Temple has come and the excitement of where it will be going.  We had a lot of time to talk, to experience, and follow-up with ritual by the end of the retreat.  I hadn't yet decided, by the time the retreat began,